MAJOR meltdown

This new season on my life is so UP and DOWN

Let's start with "working out"

I have tried...

abs...the six pack

legs...dancers

buns...of steel

arms...that rock

blah...blah...blah..

I have been trying...but...they AREN'T any fun!

Fast forward....

I had a MAJOR melt down this week...on the golf course, no less

I purchased this cute new out fit...yes, you CAN be cute on the golf course

and YES...it was a skirt/dress thingy

my PREFERRED wardrobe!

Anyhoo...I had asked David to take a few pictures of me golfing so I could have them for

our "first golf game" in Texas

Well he did...and I look at them to see if he got a good shot...SADNESS

my hips looked huge and my legs...well let me just say

I DELETED them all, and proceeded to cry.

Of course David couldn't figure out what was wrong with me...

MENOPAUSE???

He thought I was upset about my golf game :)

Come on now...I keep score with smiley faces or sad faces...

I finally said, my legs are ugly and I look fat in my new outfit...

at this point...he should have said, "No you don't honey, you are beautiful and you look great!"

but he didn't...why?

Because he had ALREADY told me that AT LEAST 4 times that morning, and everyday for that matter

and since he had already told me this, he just figured, I wasn't listening to him

what can you say?? I am crazy :)

Well I continue to fight the tears as we played on.

I manage to pull myself together. I AM beautiful to my husband and to my Heavenly Father!

Note...I am looking for a new "cute outfit" for the next game :)

So, as i am relfecting on my emotional...menopausal...reaching middle age...new season...

I am discovering....NOTHING!

not really :)

When it gets bads for me...it is usually a heart issue.

When I am feeling unsettled on the outside...needing a change...new hair style...

new color....wardrobe change....

for me that is usually and indication that something is NOT right on the inside.

Trying to change the outside, when it is the inside, won't bring peace and contentment

I realize, I am feeling a bit disconnected from God.

changes, moves, trying to find a church here, a place to serve, a place to belong...

it is a hard season

But I was encouraged by my daughter this week and what she shared in her blog

...beauty comes from the hard places

I know I am beautiful and fruitfulness will come out of this season in my life, as long as I am connected to the Vine, Jesus

So this season of change....brings me back to the simpler times

I am renewing my worship time, with old worship music...Ron Kenoly, Don Moen, Morris Chapman

I am renewing my study time, with just the word

There is so much out there to learn and grow from, I was feeling scattered...

so for now, just the word!

I am excited about the simple quiet time I get with the Lord.

He quiets my spirit, and speaks words of love over me...

He loves me, oh how He loves me!

 

Back to the WORK OUT

I am NOT going to have buns of steel or a six pack...it just isn't in me

I know I can do all thing through Christ...but i also know, that everything ISN'T for me

what is for me?

ZUMBA

where have you been all my life, and why have I waited so long to try you?

I love dancing

I was in tap, ballet and jazz as a child

on a dance team

and was a "Pommie"

(Pom Pom for the older generation and Spirit Line for the younger)

It is fun and I enjoy it!

I have also added Yoga to my healthier life style and am still juicing

So....all of that to say...

I don't know I forgot already??

not really,

God is faithful and His love for me is amazing, through every season and change, He brings me joy

even in the hard places.

So maybe it is time to change things up...

what fruit is going to come out of this new season???

I can't wait to see